15 Things You Should Give Up To Find Happiness:
Here is a list of 15 things which, if you give
up on them, will make your life a lot easier and much, much happier. I hold on
to so many things as others do too, and they cause a great deal of pain, stress
and suffering – and instead of letting them all go, instead of allowing
ourselves to be stress free and happy – we cling on to them. Not anymore.
Starting today I will give up on all those things that no longer serve me. Are you ready? Here we go:
1. Give up your need to always be right
There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea
of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk of ending great
relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for
others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump
into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question:
“Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?” Wayne Dyer. What
difference will that make? Is your ego really that big?
2. Give up your need for control
Be willing to give up your need to always
control everything that happens to you and around you – situations, events,
people, etc, you can’t control everything anyway! Whether they are loved ones,
co-workers, or just strangers you meet on the street – just allow them to be.
Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you will see how much
better will that make you feel.
“By letting it go it all gets done. The world is
won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond
winning.” Lao Tzu
3. Give up on blame
Give up on your need to blame others for what
you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your
powers away and start taking responsibility for your life.
4. Give up your self-defeating self-talk
Oh my. How many people are hurting themselves
because of their negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset?
Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s
negative and self-defeating. You are better than that.
“The mind is a superb instrument if used
rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.” Eckhart Tolle.
5. Give up your limiting beliefs
Beliefs about what you can or cannot do, about what is
possible or impossible. From now on, you are no longer going to allow your
limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in the wrong place. Spread your wings and
fly!
“A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is
an idea that holds the mind” Elly Roselle.
6. Give up complaining
Give up your constant need to complain about
those many, many, maaany things – people, situations, events that make you
unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you un-happy, no situation can make
you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that
triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never
underestimate the power of positive thinking.
7. Give up the luxury of criticism
Give up your need to criticize things, events or
people that are different than you. We are all different, yet we are all the
same. We all want to be happy, we all want to love and be loved and we all want
to be understood. We all want something, and something is wished by us all.
8. Give up your need to impress others
Stop trying so hard to be something that you’re
not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop
trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take off all
your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find
people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.
9. Give up your resistance to change
Change is good. Change will help you move from A
to B. Change will help you make improvements in your life and also the lives of
those around you. Follow your bliss, embrace change – don’t resist it.
“Follow your bliss and the universe will open
doors for you where there were only walls” Joseph Campbell.
10. Give up labels
Stop labelling those things, people or events
that you don’t understand as being weird or different and try opening your
mind, little by little. Minds only work when open. “The highest form of
ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.” Wayne
Dyer.
11. Give up on your fears
Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist – you
created it. It’s all in your mind. Correct the inside and the outside will fall
into place.
“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”
Franklin D. Roosevelt.
12. Give up your excuses
Send them packing, get Alan Sugar on them, point
the finger and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot of times
we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and
working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves,
using all kind of excuses – excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.
13. Give up the past
I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the
past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening,
but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all
you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the
past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was present.
Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. Have a
clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the
now. Life’s a journey not a destination. In the words of the Zen Dog
‘He knows
not where he’s going,
For the ocean will decide.
It’s not the DESTINATION...
It’s
the glory of the ride’
-Edward Monkton.
14. Give up attachment
This is a concept that, for most of us is so
hard to grasp and I have to tell you that it was for me too, (it still is) but
it’s not something impossible. You get better and better at with time and
practice. The moment you detach yourself from all things, (and that doesn’t
mean you give up your love for them – because love and attachment have nothing
to do with one another, attachment comes from a place of fear, while love…
well, real love is pure, kind, and self less, where there is love there can’t
be fear, and because of that, attachment and love cannot coexist) you become so
peaceful, so tolerant, so kind, and so serene. You will get to a place where
you will be able to understand all things without even trying. A state beyond
words. I don’t believe in attachment parenting, I believe in LOVE parenting!
15. Give up living your life to other people’s
expectations
Way too many people are living a life that is
not theirs to live. They live their lives according to what others think is
best for them, they live their lives according to what their parents think is
best for them, to what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their
government and the media think is best for them. I did this for years. Eventually
it backfires, trust me. They ignore their inner voice, that inner calling. They
are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s
expectations, that they lose control over their lives. They forget what makes
them happy, what they want, what they need….and eventually they forget about
themselves. You have one life – this one right now – you must live it, own it,
and especially don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.
So if you’ve read this and thought, wow she must be really
serene and enlightened having done all these things then don’t kid yourself. I haven’t done
them. I’m trying to do them. All. No apologies for trying to be a better
person.
Just one step at a time....
Namaste
